Very, very bad day

The weekend at Karen's was incredible. She has such a great family. It was only the coming home part that will make my life suck for quite some time.

We broke up. Coming close to 2 monthes now and we broke up. This is without a doubt one of the greatest hurts that I have ever felt. You people that date constanly, I have no clue how you can do it. I have no clue how you can expose yourself to such hurt over and over again and just get right back up and get back into the game. I don't see how you can do it. I don't want to do it.

Can someone answer me a question? Why do I have to be such a moron? Why can't I just change into the man that I know that I need to be? Why do I have to have crap in my life that screws every other aspect of my life over? Why does life have to be so complicated in the first place? If anyone can answer those questions for me, I'm quite impressed. You should go into psycology or philolosophy or theology or something.

This last part is to Karen, everyone else can ignore it:
I love you. I don't want you to ever think otherwise. No matter what happens throughout the rest of our lives, I will always love you. I gave you more of me than anyone else I have ever known, and you hurt me more than anyone else ever could have. I forgive you though...I love you.